Since I wrote and sent the email to M. I knew he wouldn't return a response very quickly, but now I am allowing myself to go places in my mind that I don't need to go. What if he just wanted to hear from me, he might not write back. What if he isn't handling it well? I don't want to be a source of pain for him, it was never my intentions. I know he got it, he has read it and he has logged into Myspace every morning before school since he got it, could he be composing a return email? Could he be re-reading it, trying to read something that isn't there? Did I say to much? Did I not say enough?? I was thinking yesterday that I wish I had invited him to be friends on Myspace but now I feel it is to late, I don't want to push him. I just wish he would give me something, and I guess he kinda did. He and K (his girlfriend) both changed their pics, so I got to see new ones, that was nice. But I want so badly to hear from him, for him to tell me he is ok, to tell me I haven't completely ruined his life by my dreams of being a part of it.
I need Starbucks, I need a freaking EMAIL from a 17 yr old kid who probably has not thought about me since he read it on Monday....*sigh*
5 comments:
I will agree with some of the things you've said - like that he's re-reading the letter over and over before he hits "send"...but I can't sign onto the idea that he hasn't thought about you since Monday, so please don't let yourself go there. He's thinking about you, I'm sure of it.
((((hugs))))
I agree with Tmom.
You're in my prayers!
Ani
He is in the "Man" cave.
I agree with all of the above. I'm willing to bet it's almost ALL he's thought of!!! (((HUGS)))
17-yr-old boys are confusing. There is no figuring them out.
But I'm pretty sure he's thinking about a lot and your message meant something, even if he hasn't responded yet.
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